There is nobody who is better looking than Jeff was. He was supposed to be mine! I just looked at the pictures I got from our trip to the Caribbean. I look so fat and ugly and dark. I fucking hate myself. I am definitely going to kill myself. I'm just waiting for the right time. God doesn't care about me. He'll keep on treating me like this. Of course I'm fat and ugly. And everytime I think about it, I get really angry and depressed and want to eat more. I just wish somebody would come to my house and kill me. For some strange reason I'm writing my own wedding vows. I wish Jeff were mine. I wish we could've gotten married.
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