God, I'm so sick of being unhappy. Can you change me? I'm sick of being this way! I want complete happiness. Can you help me please? I'm depressed, I'm peturbed. I think life isn't worth it. Can you work your hardest, beyond maximum strength to get me to a place I would love to be? I'm so fucking tired of living! God, I didn't get any sleep this morning. I don't feel psychotic, but I just feel so fed up and pissed off and unhappy, like nothing's going to change. It all started with Jeff this morning, when I got into bed with him and started my spiel on how I needed him so bad and so on. God, it's afternoon now and I'm still upset. I feel like hurling myself through a glass window and dying from severe blood loss. God, I can't take it. I can't handle the PAIN I'm IN. Why are you subjecting me to this torture? My apartment is a mental torture farm, given to me all at the hands of my Savior. This shouldn't be. God, help me!
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