For some reason today I can't control what I put in my mouth. I'm like, eating like crazy. At 8 I had a bowl of Special K, and I thought I was going to have it again for lunch, but at 12 I had a pb&j sandwich with some Cheetos. I had one sliced apple. I don't know, I feel like gorging myself with food. I just called the Italian restaurant and I'm getting a personal pan delivered to my place along with a salad. I had both of them before; the salad comes with two rolls. I just had a 25 cent bag of Dortios. I don't know why I get this way. I want to loose weight, not gain more, and look at me! My goal today was to eat Special K for breakfast and lunch, then my homeade soup for dinner, with snacks in between. Umm, my pizza just came...delicioso! But he forgot my house salad. I don't know what to do with my out of control eating habits that come so quickly it seems. On Today they were talking about would you rather be 45 lbs. overweight and smart or be skinny and dumb. I'd rather be skinny and dumb. I'm already so fat; I'm over 45 lbs fat. My metabolism is muy slow. Forget it. I think I'm dumb and I'm already well over 45 lbs. overweight.
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Hey, this just happens to be a very overweight person that's reading your blog! And, I think I'm rather dumb for being like this because it can't be all that hard to be skinnier if there are so many skinny people out there! But, then again, there are a lot of overweight people out there, too, aren't there?
The urge to eat...sometimes not even an urge, I just do it anyway... comes from filling up something that's empty, even if it isn't the stomach that's empty! Filling up depressed or lonely feelings, filling up a hurt or pain, filling up long boring hours, filling up nerves that are making it difficult to face something, etc. Other times it's just because the food is there, or it's a habit, or because there's a special food that is particularly a favorite and there's no desire to wait and eat it later. And, then, at least in my case, I just love to eat.
I learned some tricks and every diet "authority" will tell you what you HAVE to do. Some of those things really do work, but that's because the person makes them work...not because they work by themselves. Heck, you can lose weight eating cake at every meal! I know people who gain weight eating salads! So, you just need to figure out WHAT you can do and be happy with.
Personal pan pizza? Sure, why not? Apple? Sure, why not? If I eat those things haphazardly I do not lose weight and sometimes I gain. If I eat those things but pay attention to what I'm eating, I'll lose weight. I can't figure it out. Some say to write everything down...the results will shock you and you'll automatically start cutting down. Some say to balance the diet...that works if you're a person who plans everything ahead. My way is the "diabetic diet", but basically followed by the "eat the amount that fits in your hand" method. (I lost over 100 pounds doing that. When I stopped paying attention, I put 50 pounds back on. I've just started paying attention again and I've lost 30 of those pounds and intend to keep going until I get to the weight I was reaching for in the first place.)
Just don't be too hard on yourself, ok?
I'll try...but everytime I look at myself in the mirror or just looking at my body as I get out of bed, it's like eww gross.